R2 INVADES THE 'BORO!!

This is the coolest mailbox I've ever seen! Too bad it's bolted down or I would have some new home decor.

CHEK'S BIRTHDAY/ ST. PATRICK'S DAY FESTIVITIES

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY COOP!!

I know I'm a day late but it's the thought that counts. Just wishing the man a very happy 59th! Here's to 59 more.

SHOOT ME, BABY!

I wrote this in the recent past and forgot about
it. I got a good laugh when I got to the end of it.

Machine Gun





the house grows darker just like my thoughts for you
I don’t want you to mean a thing to me
I don’t want to feel any life for you
I could die and I doubt very seriously if you would even notice
I would like to take you and your so-called friends and grind you into a fine powder
you all suck
no wonder you’re all so fucked up
I think truly, I could mow you down with a machine gun
none of you are worth it though
lying, uncaring whores
one way or another you sell yourself to get what you want
screw all those who really give a shit about you
continue to stay with the abusive, drunk, worthless pieces of shit
the fire burns me alive and I want it to spread and consume you
I want you to burn with me
you haven’t had it bad you just let it continue because you’re too much of a dumbass to
do anything about it
fuck you

HOW TRUE

DEEP THOUGHT OF THE DAY

Some people are like slinkies,

They don't really have a purpose,

But they still bring a smile to your face

When you push them down the stairs!

ONCE AGAIN

ONCE AGAIN

goodbye
I just keep on dying
it’s not like I’m really tryin
but too much of you has taken away

the ending
it feels just like the beginning
before and after depending
on how pretty you feel today

silence
how quickly it can turn to violence
in the face of your defiance
hate these silly games

whatever
just forget about forever
now turns into never
only me left to blame

disgust
in me you never trust
overflow about to bust
dripping wet with sin

words
just a bunch of useless words
all I have is words
without you once again

THE INFECTION

THE INFECTION

here I sit without you again
somewhere else but it’s not with me
never is never was never will
I’m always number 2 or 3

treated like shit but you like being smothered in it
feeling like shit but to me it’s all relative
walking in shit every step I take
looking like shit at least it’s not fake

will the phone ever ring
will you ever come see me
will my heart bleed
the closer you come to me

I really didn’t think I wanted to see you again
I really hoped I wouldn’t see you again
I want to hold you as I want to let you go
I can’t hold you and you won’t let me go

treated like shit but you like being smothered in it
feeling like shit but to me it’s all relative
walking in shit every step I take
looking like shit at least it’s not fake

will my sanity stay sane
as you whisper my name
will you infect me
like you did once before

will the phone ever ring
will you ever come see me
will my heart bleed
the closer you come to me
will my sanity stay sane
as you whisper my name
will you infect me
like you did once before

THE MILLIONTH TIME

THE MILLIONTH TIME

writing out little bits of chaos
alone in the dark minus the light
I sit here for the millionth time
I sit here like I always do

nothing heard is a sweet sound
you just keep playing lost & found
everything changes every damn day
I try so hard but can’t keep you away

you’re never here when I need you the most
someday a memory a ghost
I’m always here when you’re at your worst
that’s when I know I’m never first

there’ll be a time when you laugh me off
I’ll be the flame when you piss me off
it’ll be a lie when you pull me close
you can’t deny who you want the most

my mind betrays and I think of you
wounds I’ve sustained because of you
I must like the pain you put me through
cut up and scarred from your battle wounds

what’s love to you some strange attraction
crushing guys like me that’s your satisfaction
stabbed through my heart how do you do it
it’s such an art to you nothing to it

THE STAND

THE STAND

no one can save you now
you’ve thrown it all away
you don’t even care you’re like everyone else
pop your ego trip with an ice pick

too hot for words but I say fuck it
too much for you but you know you want it
I scare you I thrill you it’s all a head trip
if you care for me kill me don’t let your aim slip

cut loose the noose you hang on me
I hang daily but I know you never see
wipe the smile from your face the light from your eyes
I never was good at saying goodbyes

slit your throat slit my wrists slit the sky
blood falls in buckets blood is waist high
my blood is blue from ol’ Mr. Xan
my blood is drained when you hold my hand

there’s no time to waste anymore
I need to be free from the edge of death’s door
I’m leaving I’m tired of falling behind
I didn’t want it I didn’t want it I didn’t want it

I’m gone so gone you’ll never know where
this place is no home there’s no place any where
it’s over I need to evolve with the madness
it’s over like sweet laughter to sadness

FUNDAMENTALLY LOATHSOME

A fantastic song from the album, "Mechanical Animals." Oh, it's by Marilyn Manson.


FUNDAMENTALLY LOATHSOME

I want to wake up in your white, white sun
I want to wake up in your world with no pain
But I'll just suffer in a hope to die someday
While you are numb all of the way

When I hate it
I know I can feel
butwhen you love it
you know it's not real
No

I am resigned to this wicked fucking world
On its way to hell
The living are dead and
I hope to join them too
I know what to do and I do it well...

When I hate it
I know I can feel but
When you love it
you know it's not real
No

Shoot myself to love you
If I loved myself I would shoot you

WHAT ELSE CAN BE SAID?

THE HEAD & THE HEART



I wonder why we became so close
some things I’ll never understand
maybe it’s for the best
but I’ll never understand the choices you make

I wonder if us getting that close
is the reason we’re this close
how close is this close
there’s always somebody between us

can’t commit and don’t think you will
I don’t think it will be me
I don’t think I stand a chance
you can’t cut the hold on you

how can you turn away from what you want
I know what you say that others don’t
I’ve lost you once before
there’s no way I could go through it twice

time ticks on minutes lost without you
I know what keeps you from me
and I’m helpless to stop it
and I wonder if you even care

this is what it’s like without you
lost and confused alone yet again
the head wants to cut loose
the heart wants to hang around

KILL ME, PLEASE

THE ASSASSINATION

are you prepared to see me die
my death my blood covers your hands
no weapon caused the termination
your lack of action caused my assassination

no hurt was supposed to come to me
yet somehow I found the final solution
the only way out death by suicide
I had a nice supply of pills I had gathered for several months

consequences of betrayal I could not think of a more painful way
to hurt you than by my taking myself out of the equation
it’s all on you can you live with the guilt
I want to murder you with guilt

I want to become a scar in your mind
I want to haunt your ever thought
I want to always be just one step behind you
I’m always breathing down your neck

what means more to you
settling for what you’ve got
or getting what you really want
this is why I’m dead I lost

I love the cold ground
the worms tell me stories of all those they’ve devoured
I ask them to make quit work of me
the less of me left here to suffer the better

yet now you seem to miss me
you lost the only true thing in your life
you’re just like all the rest
what a surprise I’m not surprised I’m dead

down in the hole maggots remind me of you
eggs lain by files carriers of sickness
like the one you injected into me
I’m better off dead

I don’t have to worry about this anymore
I hope I haunt you I hope there is no rest
I’m in your soul I want to consume you
and hope you end up dead like me

FIGMENTS

FIGMENTS


I hate myself so much
but I hate you that much more
nothing you say makes it any better
most of the time you say nothing

I want to just fucking slip away
I want to crawl on my belly like you
snakes slither when they lie
you lie as you crawl up to me

it’s never for me
always about you
when’s then last time you actually asked me how I was
you never ask you never cared

I don’t want to be with you
I don’t want anyone with you
I don’t want anyone with me
you never care who’s with you

bright flash the room’s exploding
you shatter inside my head
my heart breaks from all the flying glass
I bleed gasoline
ignite me and burn with me
I feel how little you care for me
I know how little you are to me
I could never trust you
I will never trust you
I could never hurt you
I wish that I could hate you

so much wasted time in this world
blown to pieces, this world
my sinful imperfect little world
the Death Star is tracking me

so how did you manage
how did you pull it off
how many lies did you tell
how many did you hurt
how many will you hurt
how many will wish they were dead
like me
guess who killed me?

PASSIVE

This song fits my life at times. Lots of the time actually. Anyway...




PASSIVE - A PERFECT CIRCLE

Dead as dead can be
My doctor tells me
But I just can't believe him
Never the optimistic one
I'm sure of your ability
To become my perfect enemy

Wake up and face me
Don't play dead 'cause maybe
Someday I will walk away and say
You disappoint me
Maybe you're better off this way

Leaning over you here
Cold and catatonic
I catch a brief reflection
Of what you could and might have been
It's your aim and your ability
To become my perfect enemy

Wake up
(Why can’t you?)
And face me
(Come on now)
Don't play dead
(Don’t play dead)
'Cause maybe
(Because maybe)
Someday
(Someday)
I’ll walk away and say
You disappoint me
Maybe you're better off this way

Maybe you're better off this way (×3)
You're better off this (×2)
Maybe you're better off...

Wake up
(Why can't you?)
And face me
(Come on now)
Don't play dead
(Don’t play dead)
'Cause maybe
(Because maybe)
Someday
(Someday)
I’ll walk away and say
You fucking disappoint me
Maybe you're better off this way!

Go ahead and play dead
(GO!)
I know that you can hear this
(GO!)
Go ahead and play dead
(GO!)

Why can't you turn and face me?
(WAKE UP!)
Why can't you turn and face me?
(WAKE UP!)
Why can't you turn and face me?
(WAKE UP!)
Why can't you turn against me?
(GO!)
You fucking disappoint me

Passive-aggressive bullshit... (×12)

TENDER MOMENTS IN LITERATURE

Well, well, well, now we know why daddy ran off with the whore. Mommy must be a republican because she licks Bush. If that wasn't Little Jimmy's mommy and he was about 20 years older, we'd have the makings to a damn fine three-way skin flick.

GREAT MOMENTS IN LITERATURE

Ahhh, memories....I remember Grandma reading this to me. She said it was the best way to explain what happened to Mommy and Daddy. Haven't seen Daddy since I was four, he works in a corn factory in Mexico. Mommy does the 2:15 am show down in Taterknob. It's a hoot, everybody goes home with a smile on their face and a strut in their stride.

LITERARY CORNER

Now just where in the hell was this when I was growing up? I can see it now. Paddington gets tanked, buys a whore, contracts a venereal disease, goes to the clinic, gets checked out, then decides to write a book about the experience.

SCREAM FOR ME, OWENSBORO!!!

What can I say, I've been a fan of Iron Maiden for 23 years now. This past Tuesday they put out yet another album and, of course, I had to buy it. So far, after hearing it in it's entirety two times, I think it's a damn good album. Their last release, Dance of Death, just really didn't do much for me. There was a song or two that wasn't bad but I thought that over all, it pretty much sucked. So I'm really glad this one didn't let me down.

I've followed this band for a long time and while they'll never release anything like Piece of Mind(1983) again, the boys can still write some cool shit. I'm really pleased with this album. After their last album, I was kind of apprehensive about buying this new one. I'm really surprised at how much I like it. I would go through track by track but I can save time and say that I actually like all ten songs. Very different stuff from the guys this time. Two thumbs up! If you're into Iron Maiden at all, I suggest picking it up. Thank you, now back to your regularly scheduled program.

GOTCHA!!!

A picture so nice, I'll use it twice. Come on, admit it! You know you looked!!

GUESS WHO?

Time to Kill



to kill you
to take you out
never to be a burden to me again
I would love to murder your memory
wash you out like a stain
you are a tumor in my brain I wish I could surgically remove
you infect me with a sickness
you disgust me
I disgust myself when I think of the time I’ve wasted on you
I want to be whole again and retrieve the pieces of me that you destroyed
you deserve whatever you get
I used to feel pity now all I feel is shitty
I don’t hate you but I hate myself for not hating you
I want to get as far from you as possible
and that still would not be far enough
the daily routine of heartbreak and rejection are making me feel older than I deserve
at least I know now I don’t deserve you
no
scratch that
you don’t deserve me